Last Training Run

Today was my very last training run. Wow.
During my run today I thought back to the very first time I ran 3 miles. It was the day Joan came back from Alaska last July. Her running buddy Charlie came by and they invited me to join them. I had only been running for maybe 3 weeks at that point and the farthest I had run was 1 1/2 miles. My stubborn will made me keep up with them even though I couldn't even speak. They jogged and chatted and I panted and tried to keep pace. I was really proud of myself when we were finished even though I felt faint and could barely walk up the stairs to put the girls to bed.
I have come a really long way. Literally. More then 550 miles. It feels really good to be on this side of the training. Just Sunday. SUNDAY.
I got the sweetest present today. Adrianne has been telling her class for awhile now about my race. Today when she got home from school she had a manila envelope full of cards the kids in her class made for me. They say things like: we are proud of you. Good Luck. And each has a picture of me running. I'll have to post some of the pictures, they are great. I could cry right now just thinking about it. Even more reasons to finish.

Miles Today: 3
Miles this Year: 370

Pass me some red vines

I am a nervous eater. It is a good thing I don't like fast food and that there are not any drive thru candy stores around here. Sunday. SUNDAY. Sunday. How can it be just days away?
The last chapter of my training book talks a lot about how you will feel like you peaked too soon and worry about being ready. When I read that months ago I was skeptical. I thought I would feel more confident, empowered. And now here I am reading it again, nodding my head, I am NERVOUS. I don't FEEL ready. I am taking this training book at its word that I am. I am trusting that doing the training and all this preparation has made me ready even though my heart is very weak.
On the advice of a friend I stopped in and tried to see a Physical Therapist on Tuesday for the pain in my hip/butt. I learned that you need a prescription for PT but the therapist had pity on me and did a free consultation. I was relieved to hear that my leg will NOT fall off during the marathon but I do have a muscle strain deep in my hip. He gave me some stretches and some encouragement. So even though my pain is not gone, I do feel better.
Sunday. SUNDAY. (deep breathing).

Pain in the butt....

Literally I have one. It came on after my long run on Saturday...only 9 miles, go figure. I wasn't worried about it at first because random "pains" have become a normal part of this training process. I was starting to get antsy on Tuesday when it still was bothering me, but the 3 miles that day went fine. Yesterday I had to go out for a 5 mile run and I was nervous. It is more then a "I'm sore" pain. It is a "I am hurt, maybe I should lay down" pain. Everything in me the first mile was telling myself to stop and go back home and the more I thought about it the more upset I began to feel. Would I even be able to run the Marathon at all? Did I really do all this training just to hurt my butt muscle 2 weeks before? If I can't even run 1 mile then how can I expect to run 26.2 miles in 10 days? My confidence was seriously undercut.
I did manage to pull it together. I thought to myself, if this was my race day what would I do?? Quit? I slowed down. I focused. I prayed. I thought through my next few training runs, how can I set them to give myself an extra day or two to rest? The training book has been reviewing a lot lately about how much the race is mental. Maybe this little butt pain is a good thing to happen to me right now. A good reminder that I am going to need to lean not just in my fitness and my body, but my mind and will need to be on board too. I was able to get into my flow and the pain went away. I did my 5 miles and finished with a better attitude.
I am still sore today but will continue to nurse my "owie". I will hopefully be feeling strong again in a day or two, but you know, even if I am not, does it really matter? I will be running this race.

Week 14, Check!

I have the pleasure of having a running buddy these last few Saturdays. My friend Bethany has been driving over from Corvallis and running part or all of the long runs with me. She will be doing the 1/2 on my marathon day and so we get to run the first 11 miles together. I really really enjoy my time alone which is good since I have 15 miles of my marathon to be alone...but I really really love my time running with my good friend.
I keep looking at the calendar to be sure, but I really only have one weekend left. I'm trying to not think too hard about it...just beginning to think of all my irrational fears now and stuff them into the far back corner of my brain.
On a more random note, my training book says to think about finishing and imagine what it will be like, how you'll feel, etc. I have come up with a few ideas of my finish line:
a) Run to within a reasonable distance of the finish, take of my running shoe (with timing chip) and throw it across the finish.
b) Run to within a reasonable distance of the finish, and stop. Stare at finish line, make the crowd nervous.
c) Run across the finish line and lay down.
Okay, I have a weird brain. Really when I let myself really imagine it, I begin to choke up a little. It's been a really long road. It has been a challenge for me physically and mentally. I'm really proud of myself. I'm humbled that I've made it this far. Then I think of my husband and all he's done for me during this training. He would have run this with me if I hadn't stubbornly decided to do this on my own. He has been such an encourager. Running some of the short runs with me...Leaving me notes on the car, my water bottle and on the road on my run route...Driving the car next to me for miles to chat with me and pick me up so I don't have to walk the driveway...Never batting an eye at all the "stuff" I need to buy, ,shoes, clothes, etc... Always asking me when I need to run and then how my run went. I have an amazing man on my team. Finishing is a victory for me. For my husband, for my family.
Miles today: 9
Miles this week: 22
Miles this Year: 357

Coming to a close

If you have ever spent any amount of time doing something it's funny how your mind begins to associate things with it. Just the smell of cardamom or bath and body works peony sanitizer will take me straight back to the 2 months I spent in India 10 years ago.
The same is becoming true for my running. I can't drive anywhere where my brooks have run without thinking of the days I pounded the pavement. Lemon lime Gatorade will do the same. Songs on the radio prompt me back to runs when I thought about them during my hours on the road.
I'm glad I won't soon forget this experience.

Miles today: 5

Week 13: Marathon Mama, 26.2 miles of peace and quiet

I saw the shirt with this postings quote on it and laughed. Someone recently asked me what I was running from and I jokingly said my kids. Some days it is more true then others.
I did my very last really long run of this training yesterday. I have 2 more weeks of shorter runs and then it's here...M day. I'm really glad that I have a lot going on right now with all the birthdays and our normal life. And since race day is on the 2nd of May, I can't even see it on the calendar yet. I'm beginning to dream about it. In the most recent I decided to start running at 9 instead of 7 and then realized that was a bad idea too late. My guts are just stirring!

Miles today: 18
Miles this week: 31
Miles this Year: 335

Week 12, Check! Dear Diary...

I have been reflecting over the past year since Charlotte's birthday is just 3 weeks away. It has sped by. I can't believe that just less then 10 months ago I was standing at the finish line of my MiL's marathon holding my 6 week old baby. Just 10 months ago I never thought any of this possible for me.

9 months ago I started walking my driveway and daring to look down the paved road and think about running.

8 months ago that I dared to create this blog and call it what I did. Believe me I felt like a big dork calling myself marathon runner. I threw the mom in at the end so it would at least be partly true. There were many other viable blog name candidates, like:
Think I might start running regularly and possibly want to run a race...we'll see.

Just over 5 months ago that I ran my very first 1/2 marathon and realized that a full was in my future. That I am not going crazy, it is possible for ME.

3 months ago I started this training. I have really enjoyed it. Grown from it. It has blessed my marriage. It has been good for the big girls. I think Charlotte has benefited from it too. I'm glad to take her to Grandma and have her delighted to go play with them instead of being totally mom-ified.

1 month ago I ran the furthest since my 1/2 marathon. A huge mental challenge. March was a high mileage month, 127 miles...insane. But I got through it.

12 hours ago I ran 18 miles. 18 MILES! I am realizing that I am getting more ready. My heart still feels weak about it. I look at the calendar and my adrenaline starts going. I am going to do this thing. And when I'm done, how much braver will I be? How much more ready for a challenge? What can I not do?

Miles today: 18
Miles this week: 31
Miles this Year: 304